I bought a couple of lottery tickets this week. I play the lottery for two reasons:
1) A part of me still wants some sort of prince charming to show up and take care of me (sorry mom).
2) I believe in giving the Universe all manner of opportunities to stream income my direction :).
I don’t like to play the lottery very often. I get too wrapped up in the fantasy of winning and how I would spend the dollars and the rest of my life. Then, inevitably when I don’t win the jackpot, I crash.
This time, though, as I was buying the tickets, I had an inspired idea, “what if I choose to FEEL as if I’ve already won?” To be clear, I mean FEEL, not ACT. I did not go on a buying binge, window shop or internet surfing as part of my FEELING like I won the lottery. Instead I tapped into HOW I would feel if I won. My number one, hands down FEELING is security, followed closely behind by relief – whew! For most of my adult life I’ve equated more money with increased security and I don’t think I’m bad, wrong, irrational or alone in this. I imagine many people might associate a certain dollar figure with security.
But… Is that where security comes from?
I’ve read and viewed countless real life stories of people that I’d consider in abject poverty, who see themselves blessed, abundant, rich, and happy. I, myself, have been near six figures and at less than zero. No matter how much money I’ve had I’ve experienced happiness and fear, exhilaration and pain, calm and anxiety.
Even more fascinating: I might have slightly less money now that I did, say, five years ago. But I still have waaaaaayyyyyy MORE assets than I did 10, 15, and 20 years ago. Yet many times I feel waaay more anxiety now than I ever remember feeling back then. WTFudge?!?
Here’s what I’m learning – I can choose to feel secure no matter what my bank account says. I can choose to feel happy no matter my circumstances. I can choose to feel panicked regardless of my net worth. I can choose to feel sad no matter what is happening.
So… I’m having all these thoughts and practicing FEELING secure, happy, and excited to write my mortgage check: “Yipee! I get to pay my mortgage,” rather than “Gall dang! I have to pay my mortgage.” And I’m super productive: handling tasks, doing some previously procrastinated business marketing, spending more time training my dogs, MELTing regularly, excitedly preparing for Nia & Pilates classes and clients (interesting how FEELING secure frees up more of my time and fills me with energy to DO my life 🙂 ).
The morning after the lottery drawing arrives. Instead of playing my normal waiting game for days and days to delay the deflation of my fantasy, today I happily check.
I’ve WON! The Universe, in its predictably hilarious way however, has sent me a message:
My quick pick numbers: 10 14 30 38 42 – 01
The winning numbers: 9 15 24 39 41 – 01
I’ve been laughing ever since and FEEL grateful that the Universe has shown me I am closing in on winning it ALL.
I’ve felt so good during this experience that I plan to continue FEELING secure, abundant, philanthropic, happy, and excited to write my mortgage check even though I only won $1.
I’m becoming my own Princess Charming.
Best lesson ever.
big love and lottery sized hugs,
Please let me know how I might be of service. My passions include plant based nutrition (especially busting the myth of how much protein we really need ;), MELT (live free from chronic pain without drugs), TRX (it’s helping become my own version of an American Ninja Warrior), reminding you of your awesomeness (you are, you know), the undisciplined girl’s guide to successful dog training (you just gotta play with purpose several times every day), books on CD (my “capped” mebomian glands make it difficult to read paper books these days), and connecting with optimists and optimist-wannabes.